She floated in darkness, tranquil, like an autumn leaf on a puddle, when, from an ocean of nothingness, a tiny speck of light the size of an ant’s eye blinked shyly and lodged at the base of her soul. As she focused on the light, it began to swirl and shimmer, vibrating and expanding, until it burst into a myriad of shards, carving an opening in her heart. Through it she fell into a wormhole filled with incessant chirping of legions of invisible crickets. The wormhole twisted and turned, its raging waterless rapids battering her like a leaky raft. She was falling… whether eons had passed or a second, she couldn’t tell. At some point, it came to her — she was falling upward.
As her endurance began to wane, the wormhole suddenly collapsed, and she was in the dark again. But this time there was a change. She felt tingling in her palms. Weak at first, the tingling grew more intense with every breath she took, spreading through her body like a forest fire. When it reached her face, her lids fluttered, and she opened her eyes.
She found herself curled up in what seemed like a cave with its porous walls lit up with faint green light; she sniffed at the wall, then licked its surface – it was rock solid and tasted of sand and fire. Following an ancient instinct, she began to crawl clumsily in search of an exit, twisting her sinuous body and clawing at the rock under her feet. After coming across the same crevice the third time, she realized she was going in circles and… there was something else. As she looked in disbelief at her sharp talons and a long powerful tail covered with scales and spikes dragging along, her mouth opened wide, as if on its own, and a blood chilling shriek rolled out of her throat, an echo bouncing off the walls like thunder.
***
“Jake, Jake, wake up! You have to look at this… Now, quick, come to the window!”
“Go back to sleep, Sam…”
“Look, look, Jake, the moon is cracking! Just like an egg!”
Jake yawned, rubbed his eyes, and got out of the bed. If that again had to do with the elusive monsters hiding in the closet, his younger brother was in big trouble. Jake didn’t bother with the slippers, just headed straight for the window, and stopped dead in his tracks: outside, a huge glowing orb of the moon was suspended in the black sky. The orb cracked open, like an egg, and spit out a creature that looked part like a bird and part like a snake. The beast regarded the two gaping boys with its emerald eyes, unfolded a pair of magnificent wings, and soared toward the stars, its serpentine tail waving. Farewell.
Cool!
How did you create this image? It’s pretty awesome.
I did it in Photoshop (a bunch of filters, masks, etc.)
Thanks for stopping by and commenting!
Thanks! Nice effect
Great image to go with the story !
Yep. Great image, except it looks like it’s getting better ratings than the story. 🙂 I spent hours and hours writing the piece and only a couple of hours on the image. Not fair! But, I ain’t complaining. 🙂
Thanks for your comment!
Beautiful – the image and story!
Thank you very much for your comment, my friend!
I agree with gkinnard. Lovely stuff.
Excellent writing. Love the picture too.
Oh, thank you so much. As a budding writer, I appreciate any kind of feedback, and positive even more so. Thank you for stopping by!
[…] writing 101 is on the home stretch and will soon approach the finish line. I’ve submitted my last assignment for peer feedback — not without heart palpitations and butterflies launching attacks on my […]
This is really, really well done. As has been said, the image adds a lot to it. But the writing is even better; I loved the introduction to Jake at the end in light of the setting you created already. Well done!
I’m a budding writer too, and would appreciate any feedback you could give me on my pieces. I just posted a micro-fiction today, Ashes to Ashes. Check it out here: http://carefullyarrangedwords.wordpress.com/2012/03/15/ashes-to-ashes/
I’ll be checking back to read more of your work!
Thank you so much for your comment! BTW, this was my CW101 final assignment, and my instructor gave me really good feedback on this one. But he and some of my classmates felt that this was part of a bigger piece. I enrolled in a GWW fiction wriitng course that starts on April 3. The initial email said we are encouraged to come to class with story ideas or even drafts. So, I am thinking to take advantage of the course and work on this piece as my project. Stay tuned, as I will be posting about the fiction class once it begins. I visited your blog and subscribed to it. Again, thanks for your comment and I hope to see you around.
That sounds like a great idea! I definitely can see how this could be expanded into some really cool things. Glad we’ve gotten connected!